Tag Archives: trust

The Threat by Mykell Hatcher-McLarin (9/1/15)

I remember the days when it wasn’t real.
I remember the days when I didn’t think
it was Real;
That I could walk down streets and
pretend I was safe.
Even though I definitely could have been safe.
Safety wasn’t second guessed.
I could walk freely and rest.
I could laugh at the carefree nature of the world.
It didn’t matter that I am boy
and the world saw me as a girl.
Only thing mattered was the laughter
curling into my cheeks,
the light in my eyes
Unphased by truths I never personally seen.
But that time was when I was a baby.
Soon as my brain grew conscious,
Everything Changed.
I don’t walk down streets the same,
Afraid of being
Molested,
Even though boys didn’t get it “as bad.”
But I was a girl in the eyes
of men more knowing than me.
Momma taught me, “Can’t Trust men
They’ll take advantage of [me].”
So I grew up not knowing how to trust men.
One day not knowing how to trust me.
Body
Mind
Spirit
Compromised in My Dreams;
Manipulated
By a perspective on repeat.
And now where does that leave me?
Where does it leave the women
I’ve known and seen
Violated under all means?
Where does leave the boy who’s
told he has a girl’s body?
How do I learn to trust masculinity
When its always been shaped as a threat to me?
The playdo’s harden over years
charred under the degrees of inferno
and nobody even knows.
Shit, I didn’t even know
till realizations hit me that even
him trying to build intimacy is
Triggering.
Can’t trust the man laying next to me.
Haven’t trusted the man standing next to me.
What is trust for the man trying to support me?
What does it mean to trust any man?
I mean
My Body; raped
My Mind; fucked
My Heart; touched inappropriately
I sit here replaying the history
Frightened of
how it’s all Engrained so Deep.
Where at the core,
I’m having trouble trusting any man;
Even Me.

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An outline for loving relationships, a doctrine for intimate revolutionaries and a reminder to myself to live each day authentically.

•I respect that each connection in my life will find its own right place, time, and spirit – with an appreciative understanding that each connection evolves in unpredictable ways.

•I realize and value that there are all kinds of love, and not all of them are sexual. I will be open to all expressions of love.

•I do not believe in placing arbitrary limits on myself or others based on an understanding of love as a finite commodity. I firmly believe that the more love I give, the more it grows and that people have an unlimited capacity to love.

•I will strive to be aware of how social conditioning is affecting my responses to love, and work towards breaking bad habits so that love can be redefined, explored, and expressed without hindrance.

•I appreciate that each expression of love is special. I recognize that all love has value and that one kind of love can never be better than another.

•I will keep my heart open to receive love. I will keep my heart open to give love. I will be open to vulnerability and intimacy. I will lower my shield to let love in and will slow down and listen when my shield goes up.

•I understand that people have varied needs, that one person cannot fulfill all needs of another, and it is our responsibility to express and get our own needs met. I recognize that this builds community and connection, which is the goal and helps to spread love.

•I will encourage those I love. I will be supportive when someone I love finds love or expresses love. I will look inward if any expression of love causes me to feel threatened or insecure. I will be open to being told I am not being supportive.

•I will examine my own fears and strive to not let them get in the way of expressing and experiencing love. I will listen with an open heart if someone’s honesty hurts me. I will strive to always respond with grace and speak authentically.

•I believe in being open to change and fluidity in relationships, even when it hurts. I believe love is the absence of guilt and fear. I believe love is acceptance that love involves choices.

•I recognize that love can become strained, love can be withheld, and love can be painful. I will strive to be honest with myself and others in order to remain compassionate to myself and others.

•I respect that love fosters deep bonds, and that expressions of love should be encouraged without the fear of threatening someone else’s comfort. I believe that compassion, safety, trust, and respect are essential to maintaining love.

•I believe that self-love is essential, and without it, love is impossible.

Ilya Parker

Everything about THIS gives me life  thank you Ilya for your #wordsoftruth#wordsofwisdom #wordsoflove

So much of religion seems to be about fear:

fear of going to hell;
fear of having bad theology;
fear of not satisfying your end of the bargain so God will favor you and bless you;
fear of others finding out how much you’re not really like the person you project and pretend to be;
fear of trusting your own inner guidance and fear of thinking for yourself;
fear of not upholding the expectations of your religious sub-culture;
fear of sexuality;
fear of people who are different;
fear of the world;
fear of messing up;
fear of not being good enough… spiritual enough… godly enough.

I don’t know which is worse – the way religion makes us afraid to die, or the way it makes us afraid to live.

Jim Palmer, Notes from (Over) The Edge

9 Ways to See God in Challenging Times

9 Ways to See God in Challenging Times

(via Dawiyd)

When times are rough, you might ask the question, “Why God?” Life is full of ups and downs, instead of questioning God seek God during challenging times.

“Heavenly Father, thank you for the tests and challenges you give us. Thank you for giving us the strength to endure them and the opportunity to grow in spiritual maturity. Please help us learn to trust you when we go through difficult times. We ask this in Jesus name. Amen.”